In episode 9, we dive into the reality of what success means for us as 4 parents, and how we should interpret that for our children.
[00:00:01] Four parents, nine kids, two houses, Didn't really want to talk about this.
[00:00:07] Four parents, nine kids, I'm queer, One thing's clear, There's no dysfunction here.
[00:00:13] Four parents, nine kids, two houses, Didn't really want kids, I'm queer,
[00:00:21] One thing's clear, There's no dysfunction.
[00:00:34] We made it.
[00:00:36] It has been a while.
[00:00:37] Barely.
[00:00:38] Yeah.
[00:00:39] We've just been grieving the golden bachelor.
[00:00:42] Tiff and I were just talking, We weren't really big fans of chalk.
[00:00:46] Sorry chalk.
[00:00:48] Yeah, I wasn't prepared for this conversation today.
[00:00:51] Yeah, AJ has thoughts too, for sure.
[00:00:54] I do have thoughts, and it could take up a whole episode.
[00:00:56] Yeah.
[00:00:56] So probably we should see it.
[00:00:57] We can talk about that.
[00:00:58] I don't know.
[00:00:59] You're talking about the AARP Bachelor?
[00:01:01] That's the one.
[00:01:02] Yeah, it's the one day Jay comes up from work, And I'm watching it, And I think it was Jonah,
[00:01:07] And he's like, What is she watching?
[00:01:08] Like AARP Bachelor?
[00:01:10] And I'm like, Yep, basically.
[00:01:11] Literally.
[00:01:12] It was great.
[00:01:13] It really is great.
[00:01:14] They're definitely, like the younger ones, they're picking off of for sure, like, I think
[00:01:20] I'm in love with this person.
[00:01:21] And then older, there's some of that.
[00:01:23] Okay, for sure.
[00:01:24] But it's like, we're choosing between the doctor and the insurance executive, huh?
[00:01:29] Interesting.
[00:01:30] Who is going to travel further?
[00:01:32] It depends.
[00:01:32] Oh!
[00:01:36] I picked up on that late, sorry.
[00:01:37] I'm just waiting for the golden bachelor in paradise.
[00:01:40] Oh yeah.
[00:01:41] I want to see them all just fucked up on the beach somewhere.
[00:01:45] That needs to happen.
[00:01:45] Wearing thongs and stuff.
[00:01:47] Stealing skates.
[00:01:48] Stealing skates.
[00:01:49] Stealing skates.
[00:01:50] Yes.
[00:01:50] That's what I'm waiting for.
[00:01:51] I already imagined them in thong.
[00:01:52] I like the difference in the kissing techniques.
[00:01:54] Oh my god.
[00:01:54] From regular to golden.
[00:01:55] I cannot deal with the kisses on either one.
[00:01:59] I'm just like, I can't watch most of the kisses.
[00:02:03] It grosses me out.
[00:02:04] I don't know why.
[00:02:04] I'm just like, it's too much sensory overload.
[00:02:06] They definitely get in there with the sound.
[00:02:08] Is it old people kissing that bothers you?
[00:02:10] No, all of them.
[00:02:11] All of them.
[00:02:13] I've always said we should just do away with something.
[00:02:16] I don't know.
[00:02:16] Speaking of thongs, did anybody else see Mike Tyson's butt last night?
[00:02:19] Oh yes!
[00:02:21] I feel like it wasn't purposeful.
[00:02:23] It felt like they did it on purpose.
[00:02:24] Yes, yeah.
[00:02:24] He's funny.
[00:02:25] I think he has a really goofy sense of humor.
[00:02:28] I don't know, but I personally loved it.
[00:02:31] I was like, yeah!
[00:02:32] We laughed pretty hard here, for sure.
[00:02:35] Show your butt.
[00:02:35] We did.
[00:02:36] I thought it was just freaking hilarious and random and not taking himself too seriously.
[00:02:41] Yeah.
[00:02:41] It was the most entertaining thing.
[00:02:42] In a very serious moment, I loved it.
[00:02:44] I thought it was so great.
[00:02:46] Yeah, I thought it was good.
[00:02:47] I don't know if it was great for the kids.
[00:02:49] Yeah, he probably wasn't under too much pressure.
[00:02:51] He probably knew all he had to do was stand there.
[00:02:53] Yeah, that's right.
[00:02:54] And get paid $20 million.
[00:02:55] $20 million.
[00:02:56] I know.
[00:02:56] Throw me in the ring.
[00:02:58] That was crazy to watch.
[00:02:58] I can stand there and jump around for...
[00:03:00] I'll do it for like $200.
[00:03:01] Yeah.
[00:03:03] Maybe for free.
[00:03:04] Yeah.
[00:03:05] Just for the exposure.
[00:03:07] For the podcast.
[00:03:08] Yeah.
[00:03:08] Trying to get it up.
[00:03:09] Those girls were freaking badass though.
[00:03:12] Yes.
[00:03:12] I could not believe what I was watching.
[00:03:14] And I agree with the broadcasting crew and the audience that that Katie girl was kind
[00:03:21] of inappropriate.
[00:03:22] Like she was cheating.
[00:03:23] Like she was head butting and leaning on the other girl.
[00:03:25] Serana.
[00:03:26] I was not cool with how much she was leaning on her, putting her whole body weight on her.
[00:03:31] Mm-hmm.
[00:03:32] What is happening?
[00:03:33] Not cool.
[00:03:34] I don't know.
[00:03:35] They definitely gave us a show though.
[00:03:36] Yeah.
[00:03:37] It was a good one.
[00:03:37] I liked it.
[00:03:38] It was good.
[00:03:39] So what are we talking about today?
[00:03:42] Tiff had a good idea.
[00:03:44] Ooh, what was it?
[00:03:45] Wait, can I pull up my text?
[00:03:49] I don't know how it started but just not putting that strain on your kids of being like you have
[00:03:55] to go to college.
[00:03:56] You have to go to trade school.
[00:03:58] You have to do this.
[00:03:59] And just letting them be successful in what makes the most sense.
[00:04:03] And as parents being honest about what's out there and helping them be accountable.
[00:04:08] And I mean you can grow your own success with entrepreneurship and just so many things.
[00:04:14] And how can we help our kids be successful without being like this is what you have to be a doctor.
[00:04:20] Right.
[00:04:21] Or I'm not going to like you anymore.
[00:04:22] And that is a very common thing in parenting that I see a lot is that people really do put that pressure on their kids.
[00:04:31] When you go to college, when you become this, that, or the other.
[00:04:35] You know in my upbringing it was when you become a mom.
[00:04:38] You know the measure of success was me having a bunch of kids.
[00:04:42] And so I think where we maybe start is what is success?
[00:04:47] How do we define that?
[00:04:49] Is success a paycheck?
[00:04:50] Is success notoriety or a title?
[00:04:53] Or in my definition success is happiness.
[00:04:59] And so because that's my definition of success, the way I try to set my children up for success is going to be different from someone who views success as a title or notoriety or money.
[00:05:14] What's notoriety?
[00:05:15] Like to be known for something.
[00:05:18] Notary public.
[00:05:19] But I know that's wrong.
[00:05:20] Hey, that's me.
[00:05:21] I'm a notary.
[00:05:21] We got one of those.
[00:05:22] Or like validation almost, right?
[00:05:24] Yeah, yeah.
[00:05:25] Yeah.
[00:05:25] Like just like the being better than everybody kind of thing.
[00:05:30] Yeah, and there's like a deeper everything with all of it because like you were saying, what is success?
[00:05:36] I think everybody was like, what is success really?
[00:05:40] If you ask them the question, they'd be like, well, I know it's not really money or I know it's not this or whatever.
[00:05:44] It's happiness.
[00:05:45] But the problem is we live in a world where it's been designed to put us in a place where happiness is this kind of success.
[00:05:55] It's getting that education.
[00:05:57] It's working that specific job or career.
[00:06:00] It's having that many children or marrying that specific person or finding success within a religion.
[00:06:07] We've been told our whole lives what success is supposed to be based off of people who have filters from the people in their lives telling them what success was supposed to be.
[00:06:16] And we grow up and that's why all of us in our mid to late 30s are like, what are we doing with our lives?
[00:06:22] Because you followed somebody else's plan for success and not your own.
[00:06:27] And so I feel like that's what we have a lot of conversations and talk about and with kids too.
[00:06:33] Like we're trying to open up the door to we don't know, you know, what success is for you.
[00:06:39] But that tricky balance on the other side, again, something we've talked about a lot, is how much as a parent are you still trying to influence because there are natural things that will help you be happier,
[00:06:54] like taking care of yourself and being kind to people in your life and whatever, you know.
[00:07:00] And so it's what kind of universal principles are there that we can help our children learn that will help them in their path to success in what they do or feel or are be to be successful.
[00:07:16] I think it goes back to what we were talking about last time with, you know, teaching them, you know, is this fact or is this what I feel?
[00:07:25] This is what I believe, you know.
[00:07:27] Like in my mind, this is what I think, you know, I think happiness is success and what does that look like for me?
[00:07:35] What does that look like for other examples of people that I know what they do makes them happy and this is what they do, you know.
[00:07:42] Just kind of just guide as best you can.
[00:07:47] But as far as like this is what you should do and this is what's going to make you happy, you know, it should just be like this is what I believe.
[00:07:55] This is what works for me.
[00:07:57] Yeah.
[00:07:58] You know, let's figure out together what's going to work for you.
[00:08:01] Let's try this.
[00:08:02] Let's try that.
[00:08:04] Yeah.
[00:08:05] And I think the like it's such a small difference between telling or explaining and just sharing, you know.
[00:08:16] Like if I share with you how I found happiness and success in my life or what feels like happiness and success to me and things that have not helped me find happiness and success, then maybe there are things in there that you can connect to and relate to that will help you.
[00:08:32] But I'm not telling you this is what you have to do to be successful and to be happy.
[00:08:37] It's just it's helped me.
[00:08:39] And I think just in general, that perspective with everything in life, you're received better.
[00:08:46] You're, you know, like people people want to know why you're happy and why you're successful.
[00:08:51] They don't want to hear you tell them what they need to do to be happy and successful.
[00:08:57] And and I think it's just so much more helpful to go that path and do the do the share.
[00:09:04] Like this is what works for me.
[00:09:05] What lets does that work for you?
[00:09:07] Oh, it doesn't.
[00:09:08] Then let's see if we can brainstorm something else that does.
[00:09:11] I like what you were saying about universal principles, because I think it's less about what am I doing with my life and more how am I doing what I want to do?
[00:09:22] Like, for instance, the principle of not giving up, the principle of grit and the principle of courage of being brave, the principle of not letting other people's opinions of you affect your decisions.
[00:09:41] The the cultivation of self-love, I think, is what is more necessary than pressuring a kid to go to any kind of school system or something is like, how do you teach kids to believe in themselves, love themselves, figure out what they love and do it with consistency and courage?
[00:10:05] That is for me, what creates success is figuring out how to do what I love and do it with consistency and with bravery, being really courageous about it.
[00:10:20] And and that is not a linear path.
[00:10:24] We were taught that success is a linear path.
[00:10:27] You do this, you do this, you do this and you will be happy.
[00:10:31] And we get to our 40s and we're like, this is bullshit.
[00:10:34] We're lost.
[00:10:36] You know, this is midlife crisis is very real.
[00:10:39] And so I think that if we can teach just a foundation of self-love, self-care, courage, bravery, motivation and consistency, if you can figure out what you love, in my opinion, your passion is literally your purpose on this earth.
[00:10:58] If you look at the earth, every flower, every bee, every, every aspect of our planet has purpose.
[00:11:05] Everything works together.
[00:11:07] And we're not supposed to be doing what someone else tells us our purpose is.
[00:11:11] We really have to figure out in our heart what makes me happy and then do that with courage and consistency.
[00:11:18] Really keep showing up to it.
[00:11:20] And 99% of the people in this world want to be successful, but they're not willing to be consistent or courageous.
[00:11:28] Or work hard.
[00:11:30] And so the people who are super brave and don't give a fuck what anyone thinks and they're doing what they love with consistency are successful, you know, happy.
[00:11:40] Yeah.
[00:11:40] Yeah.
[00:11:41] And it's okay to have hiccups and to have like things that are going to make you trip and fall down as long as you are willing to get back up and keep trying and not be like, oh, I stumbled.
[00:11:54] This can't be for me.
[00:11:55] Like I have to try something new.
[00:11:56] I'm going to find something new.
[00:11:58] Like you, if it was that easy to do what you love and make a million dollars, everyone on this planet would be millionaires.
[00:12:06] Like you, it's trial and error.
[00:12:08] It's having, like you said, that grit and that want and the desire to fight for what makes you happy.
[00:12:15] And it's not going to happen overnight.
[00:12:17] You have to work hard.
[00:12:19] And like you said, be consistent.
[00:12:21] I think being adaptable to the fact that the world is changing.
[00:12:28] So, you know, what you were saying about what we were taught, it was such a linear path of what we were supposed to do.
[00:12:35] I don't think my parents were like, you have to go to college.
[00:12:38] I don't know.
[00:12:39] I think I felt the pressure because all my older siblings went to college.
[00:12:43] And I think I wanted to because, you know, 30 years ago, the people that went to college and graduated were the ones that got really badass jobs at the end.
[00:12:54] But the world has changed.
[00:12:56] And now college degrees, like although you learn a lot, which is great, you know, but now they're a dime a dozen when it comes to now you're in a whole bunch of debt because of it.
[00:13:10] And you can't necessarily get a job.
[00:13:13] But back in the 80s or 70s, if you got a college degree, a bachelor's degree, boom, you're guaranteed to get 60 grand or more a year or 70 grand or more a year, which is like 200,000 now.
[00:13:27] So but it's different.
[00:13:29] The world has changed.
[00:13:30] So why would we follow a linear path that might have worked for us turned out to not work out for us, you know, but the ones that were the guys that were graduating college in the 80s, it seems like it worked out for them.
[00:13:47] But I graduated high school in 2000, didn't get my bachelor's degree until 2010.
[00:13:54] And the good job that I've got now has nothing to do with the fact that I got a bachelor's degree.
[00:14:00] It has nothing to do with it.
[00:14:01] I still learned a lot.
[00:14:03] Like, I'm still glad that I did it.
[00:14:06] But but I think it's those experiences, you know, what we learned along the way.
[00:14:12] Let's explain it all to our kids.
[00:14:15] Like this worked for me.
[00:14:17] This did not work for me.
[00:14:19] Just all of it, even high school, you know, like my kids know that ultimately in my life and what I chose as a career, like I feel like history class had gave zero value to my life.
[00:14:34] Well, that's my dad's favorite, favorite, favorite subject.
[00:14:38] So you think he likes to hear that like I the history, I don't feel like it impacts my life whatsoever.
[00:14:46] No, he probably doesn't like to hear that.
[00:14:48] And he you know, I grew up knowing that history was super important to him, you know.
[00:14:54] But what I teach my kids is like math is super, super important to me.
[00:14:58] You know, I'm constantly doing math in my head.
[00:15:01] How many minutes is it going to take for this really fast airplane to catch up to this really slow airplane?
[00:15:07] I've got two minutes to figure this out before something goes wrong, you know, and I'm constantly doing math in my head.
[00:15:13] And that branches out to everything in my life.
[00:15:17] You know, I think on the podcast I've said percentage this 20 percent that 80 percent.
[00:15:21] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:15:23] What am I?
[00:15:24] Is he using numbers again?
[00:15:27] But I don't try to preach to my kids that you need to know math, you need to know math, you need to know math and screw history.
[00:15:34] Like I'm just trying to explain to them, this is my experience.
[00:15:39] Let's figure out what's going to work for you guys.
[00:15:41] I love it because it's rooted in what all of this is, which is evolution.
[00:15:46] Like we, this is what I think about with this subject and so many other subjects is that we are creatures of evolution just like everything else on this planet.
[00:15:55] But we are more cognitively advanced than everything else on this planet.
[00:16:01] So they're just in their role doing their thing.
[00:16:03] And then as soon as something changes and they're like, oh, this isn't going to work for me anymore, they're ready to shift.
[00:16:08] They're just like, all right, I'm doing the new thing because that's just everything living on this planet.
[00:16:14] Yeah, outside of human beings.
[00:16:16] And so we...
[00:16:19] Who is they?
[00:16:20] Yeah.
[00:16:21] I don't even know anymore.
[00:16:22] So deep.
[00:16:24] They.
[00:16:24] They.
[00:16:26] I'm like, I got to follow what you're saying.
[00:16:28] They.
[00:16:30] Well, us as human beings.
[00:16:33] What we've learned is that, oh, there's safety in routine or there's safety in I've done this, this, this, this, and this, and I'm still alive.
[00:16:41] I'm still here.
[00:16:42] And like, even if I don't feel happy all the time or whatever, I'm okay.
[00:16:46] And so we get trapped in the idea that being in routines and doing the same things over and over again are helpful and good to us because of whatever it might be.
[00:16:56] And it's the same as like, so where that can apply here is like, it's for me, it was very difficult because it was nothing I ever thought of to parent children who were younger and then adjust as they got older.
[00:17:10] You know?
[00:17:11] And it's different when they're younger.
[00:17:13] Like, if someone's, if there's someone who's two years old, you're going to, you're going to stop them from touching the stove.
[00:17:20] Because you know that's not going to bring them happiness.
[00:17:22] And you also know that's not, that they don't understand that.
[00:17:26] But when they're 18 and they're going to touch the metaphorical stove, sometimes you got to stand back and let them touch the stove.
[00:17:33] And for a couple of reasons.
[00:17:35] One, because they need to learn and figure that out and they're capable at that age of, you know, doing everything.
[00:17:42] And then two is that you might be wrong.
[00:17:45] Like, maybe they touch the stove and they're happy, you know?
[00:17:48] Like, maybe it's something different than what you thought and believed.
[00:17:51] We just watched a movie last night that had a cool message about, like, if you connected with your younger self, you know, kind of a thing.
[00:17:58] And part of the message was that maybe the older person isn't wise about everything.
[00:18:03] Maybe, like, everything you've lived through isn't going, isn't going to be what's most helpful.
[00:18:08] It's that attitude and spirit and dreaming you had when you were 18 trying to figure things out, you know?
[00:18:15] And I really liked that.
[00:18:16] But just the whole idea of how we need to evolve in everything, not just our physical bodies evolving, I think applies to this and a lot of other things.
[00:18:27] The model has evolved, too.
[00:18:30] You know, like, Jake, you were saying, like, in the 80s, we, the model of success was the person who went to college.
[00:18:37] The lawyer, the doctor, the accountant, whatever.
[00:18:40] We're like, oh, well, they're, but our kids, the models they have of success so much of the time are, like, random millionaires on TikTok that just got to be millionaires because they're doing some stupid shit on TikTok.
[00:18:53] And it's like, when that is your model, it's really hard to figure out, like, I don't even know, but it skews your view of, like, what success is and what can I do?
[00:19:06] And then you're probably, I mean, even I do it.
[00:19:08] I compare myself to other TikTokers.
[00:19:11] What are they doing that I'm not?
[00:19:13] What do they have that I don't?
[00:19:14] And when you see somebody who looks like they're, you know, just goofing off and making millions of dollars, you know, it just ruins your motivation to want to really work hard for anything.
[00:19:26] And so it's a mindfuck a little bit for our kids and for all of us, honestly.
[00:19:31] And so that's why I go back again and again to the model of do what you love and do it with courage and do it with consistency.
[00:19:39] That is the equation for success, in my opinion.
[00:19:42] I love what you're saying about that because, like, when we were kids and younger and you see, like, a child star on TV or, like, some kid in high school that made it famous as a singer,
[00:19:53] it was, like, inherent to us that, like, that's not everybody.
[00:19:56] Like, this person caught a break or whatever, you know, and, like, whatever it is.
[00:20:01] But you take a 13-year-old and put TikTok in front of them and they see person after person that's famous and making money and doing all these things.
[00:20:10] But there are 2 billion people on this app, you know.
[00:20:13] Not all of them are doing that or making it or whatever.
[00:20:17] And so it does.
[00:20:17] It skews.
[00:20:18] It creates.
[00:20:19] And it's possible.
[00:20:19] I love it.
[00:20:20] It's so cool that, like, everything's changing and there are different ways to figure this out and find success financially or in your career or whatever.
[00:20:29] But it creates a skewed perspective of what, how easy that might be to do, you know.
[00:20:37] But it is also exciting because we do live in a time where anybody can be successful doing anything, you know.
[00:20:44] Yeah, Jonah mentioned just the other night, he said something my brother Thomas said to me.
[00:20:52] Maybe you can just say it.
[00:20:53] It was something along the lines of Thomas said, if I had the work ethic that dad had, I would already be a millionaire or something like that.
[00:21:02] And he wasn't trying to call me dumb.
[00:21:04] Right.
[00:21:05] He was just trying to call me 43 and not necessarily advance to the times and possibilities, capabilities of online and content creation and TikTok and Facebook or YouTube, all that stuff, you know.
[00:21:19] Like, yeah, I grind.
[00:21:22] You know, I work really hard.
[00:21:23] But it's very 43-year-old, small-minded, work hard.
[00:21:28] Like, okay, how big can these efforts, if they are completely successful, how big can it really get?
[00:21:35] How much money can it really make me?
[00:21:37] How happy can it really make me?
[00:21:39] Like, all those things.
[00:21:40] But I think that's the point that he was trying to make was just that, you know, with all the online stuff he could do or all the ideas, he's like, if I had that drive, then I would already have millions in the bank.
[00:21:56] I thought it was a cool point.
[00:21:57] Jonah quoted Thomas earlier today, too.
[00:22:00] He said, nothing I hate more than a bad excuse.
[00:22:04] That's right.
[00:22:06] But, yeah, that's really good.
[00:22:08] I mean, I think that a work ethic that you have is such an awesome advantage.
[00:22:16] Like, I watch you and I'm in awe of what you accomplish and everything you do and the way that you serve people.
[00:22:24] I'm always amazed.
[00:22:25] It blows my mind.
[00:22:27] Well, I appreciate that.
[00:22:28] Thank you.
[00:22:28] He's not a writer.
[00:22:29] But it's like, maybe those efforts need to be focused more on podcasts or creating music that can be put online or this and that thing.
[00:22:43] You know, the world is changing.
[00:22:45] And a small town working hard.
[00:22:50] Yeah, you're going to be able to make ends meet and take care of your family if you keep on grinding.
[00:22:56] But how much further than that is it going to take you if that's what you want?
[00:23:02] True.
[00:23:03] And look at the economy in general anyways.
[00:23:05] How much longer can that last, you know?
[00:23:08] Like, if everything keeps going up and, like, if the way this all works keeps changing,
[00:23:13] then the person who's just putting their head down and working their butt off with the small town grind and whatever to make ends meet is getting worked out.
[00:23:21] Does that mean you're doing my hands?
[00:23:24] Getting pushed out.
[00:23:25] Yeah.
[00:23:26] Yeah.
[00:23:26] You know?
[00:23:27] Isn't there as much.
[00:23:27] And so, it's like everything else.
[00:23:29] You have to.
[00:23:29] It's an evolution.
[00:23:31] We adapt and we change.
[00:23:32] And people who don't want to adapt and change tend to struggle, I feel like.
[00:23:37] Yeah.
[00:23:38] I don't know if I can really bring it back home and tie it in, but it did pop in my mind the other day of, I think it was when we were talking about politics.
[00:23:47] And, but anyway, I was just thinking, like, okay, the original, like, when the Constitution was written, like, you know, the original 13 colonies.
[00:23:57] What was, like, what, we talk about the American dream now.
[00:24:02] Like, what is the American dream and what was it originally?
[00:24:07] Right.
[00:24:07] And it made me think about, you know, like, holding a job or starting your own business.
[00:24:14] You know, was the American dream in the original colonies ever to, like, be the employee of the local blacksmith?
[00:24:22] Right.
[00:24:23] Like, no, there's no possible way that that was the original plan.
[00:24:27] It was like, come over to America, start your own thing and, and figure it out and, you know, start a business, basically.
[00:24:37] Like, that had to have been the American dream.
[00:24:39] Yeah, I already told you I'm terrible with history.
[00:24:42] But what else, what else could the American dream have been if it wasn't to come here and start your own thing?
[00:24:48] Yeah, the whole idea of, I just forgot the word about capitalism, you know, and, and see how that's evolved, too, because capitalism was the American dream back then.
[00:24:58] Start your own thing, be your own boss, have your own land, do whatever you want to do.
[00:25:04] And then it's evolved and changed and become something different.
[00:25:08] And so the American dream can't really be the same anymore.
[00:25:11] Like, it's, you know, like, it has to adjust and be different.
[00:25:14] And what is it?
[00:25:15] And wasn't it also to escape, I might be mixing this in with Mormonism, but it wasn't it also to escape religious, like, rules, persecution?
[00:25:26] Yeah, to separate church and state.
[00:25:28] Separate church and state and to avoid the British taxes, right?
[00:25:32] And now look where we are now.
[00:25:34] Yeah.
[00:25:34] Like, yeah.
[00:25:36] I'm moving to England.
[00:25:36] I don't know that we're better off.
[00:25:38] We're going to get started what to believe and give us your money.
[00:25:41] Yeah.
[00:25:42] And it's like, I don't know, what percentage of us are really tackling that American dream?
[00:25:48] I think this podcast should just become about the new American dream.
[00:25:52] We start a cult.
[00:25:53] Hear me out.
[00:25:55] That's where the money is.
[00:25:57] Yeah.
[00:25:59] Cult time.
[00:26:00] Jan's like, the best part about leaving the cult is starting your own.
[00:26:06] That's great.
[00:26:07] I like it.
[00:26:08] Yeah.
[00:26:09] And I honestly think we're trying our best as four parents.
[00:26:13] We're trying to be consistent and brave and do what we love because, you know, kids are going to do what you do.
[00:26:21] They are not going to do what you say.
[00:26:23] They follow example.
[00:26:25] And all we can do is try our best to do what we think is a formula that's going to equal success for us, which by my definition is just happiness.
[00:26:38] And for me, I want to live abundantly.
[00:26:41] I absolutely want to live.
[00:26:42] That's part of my happiness is to live abundantly.
[00:26:44] I don't want to need or fear for anything, you know?
[00:26:49] Right.
[00:26:49] There's nothing wrong with that being part of your happiness, but I just think that as parents, whatever we want our children to change in their life, sometimes maybe we need to look at ourselves and say, okay, am I doing these things?
[00:27:03] And how can I set a better example and show the way a little bit better?
[00:27:08] And, you know, I know I can do better at that, I'm sure, but I do think we're trying to show up and be brave.
[00:27:15] And I give us all a high five.
[00:27:17] Bye-bye.
[00:27:17] Bye-bye.
[00:27:18] Yay!
[00:27:18] Bye-bye.
[00:27:20] Oh, crap, I can't reach you.
[00:27:21] Good work, everybody.
[00:27:22] Air high five.
[00:27:22] High five.
[00:27:24] Gotcha.
[00:27:24] That was close enough.
[00:27:26] Well, thanks, everybody.
[00:27:27] Yeah.
[00:27:27] Yeah, that was good.
[00:27:28] Thank you, thank you.
[00:27:29] Four parents, nine kids, two houses.
[00:27:32] That's right.
[00:27:32] Didn't really want to talk about it.
[00:27:34] Four parents, nine kids, two houses.
[00:27:37] Didn't really want to talk about this.
[00:27:40] Four parents, nine kids, I'm queer.
[00:27:42] One thing's clear, there's no dysfunction here.
[00:27:46] Four parents, nine kids, two houses.
[00:27:48] Didn't really want to talk about this.
[00:27:51] Four parents, nine kids, I'm queer.
[00:27:53] One thing's clear, there's no dysfunction here.